Many other parents are going through what you’re going through and there are many who are further on in their journey. Research suggests that roughly one in every hundred children is affected by autism in the UK, and there is some suggestion that the rate might be higher than that.

The way in which a diagnosis has been made will vary from one person to another. For some it will have been a relatively straightforward process but for others it may have taken months or even years.

For some parents, receiving a diagnosis is a shock as they may not have realised that their child had ASD. For others, there may be feelings of relief following a long time of knowing that there was something different about their child.

“[Getting a diagnosis] meant I could start to live and get the best out of life for my son.” (Parent)

“..we finally held the missing puzzle piece. This helped as we could now justify typical autistic behaviour and learn how to tackle and resolve arising situations.” (Sibling)

There is no right or wrong way to feel about your child being diagnosed with ASD. Parents experience a variety of emotions around this, and these can often change on a daily basis. It is quite normal to experience feelings such as: sadness, anger, guilt, worry, denial, frustration, or feeling acknowledged and validated, pleased or hopeful. Some families go through a process that starts with shock and an inability to do anything, and then moves through anger to some sort of acceptance. But parents of children with autism emphasise that it really helps when you reach a point at which you can begin to accept the situation.

Some families feel a huge sense of relief that the differences and challenges experienced by their child are recognised by professionals and that there is a reason and a name for them.

Different family members are likely to take a different amount of time to come to terms with the diagnosis. Difficulties may arise when people are not experiencing the same feelings, or not experiencing the same feelings at the same time. It is important to realise that individuals will feel differently, and to try and have some understanding about this. Talking about problems will often help with family understanding, but is usually only a good idea when all those involved are ready to do so.

It is important to remember that your child is still the same child they were before they received their diagnosis; they have not changed. The only change is that now you have a diagnosis you will be better able to understand your child and their needs.

“…my mum has become involved and founded a support group for parents of autistic children. As a result of this I am fortunate enough to have had multiple opportunities to attend group meetings and various seminars that have offered a lot of help, advice and information on how autistic people think, act and function.” (Sibling)

“If you can, find a parent support group so that you are supported and don’t feel so alone.” (Parent)