Everybody feels worried, stressed and nervous at times. Anxiety can keep us safe from danger, but when it becomes overwhelming it can stop us from doing things we need to do and affect our relationships with others. Children with neurodevelopmental difficulties (e.g. Autism Spectrum Disorder) are particularly likely to suffer from anxiety, but there are strategies that we know can help.

Low self-esteem is having a negative view of ourselves. Children with neurodevelopmental difficulties or physical disabilities can become aware of differences or feel that they don’t fit in, affecting self-confidence and mood. Children with low self-esteem can find it difficult to build and maintain friendships, feel lonely or find it hard to try new things that they may enjoy.

All children may cry, feel sad or upset at some point, but it is important to get help if your child’s low mood does not go away. Signs that your child is feeling low could be: not being interested in things they used to enjoy, feeling tired and exhausted a lot of the time, being more irritable than normal, tearful, withdrawn, changes in sleep and appetite, feeling guilty, worthless or misunderstood, self-harming or suicidal thoughts. Children with additional needs may find it particularly hard to recognise and communicate their feelings. When these feelings prevent the child from enjoying life and not being interested in things they used to enjoy is when some support and advice is needed.

What you can do to help

Children sometimes need support with their feelings. It is important to listen to your child and try to understand their world. It can help to make it normal to talk about tricky feelings at home.

It is good to talk about feelings: Make time to talk and listen to your child to about his or her feelings. Find creative ways to help your child let you know how they feel, e.g. drawing, play, pictures, writing worries down and throwing them away.

Remain calm: we are role models for our children and it is important to show them ways to manage difficult feelings.

Solution time: Think together about different solutions to difficult situations and chose the best ones.

Relaxation time: Work out what helps your child to relax e.g. music, jumping on trampoline, colouring, go out in nature. You can also help your child to learn relaxation strategies e.g. breathing gently and slowly (slowly blowing bubbles can be a good and fun way to help your child to do this). Some children find sensory activities relaxing, for ideas please see the Sensory Strategy leaflet.

Focus on positives: Spend some time with your child noticing some positive things that they did during the day. Praise your child and celebrate their successes.

It’s ok to make mistakes: Show your child it’s ok to make mistakes, by sharing your mistakes and being kind to yourself about them. When your child make a mistake try to help them to see it positively, as a way we all learn.

Sharing experiences: talk to your child about their experiences. Help them to connect with others with similar difficulties, this might be in person (e.g. support group), online, or books. For more information on activities available locally, click here.

Listen to what your child says and how they're feeling, keep in regular contact with each other.
Focus on things your child enjoys doing.
Encourage your child to spend time with other people e.g. friends, family, clubs and pets.
Encouraging a healthy lifestyle can be helpful for mood:

Regular exercise and time outdoors
Getting enough sleep. See sleep section for more information.
Eating well. See Change4Life for ideas.

How we can help

If you have concerns about your child’s emotional well-being please speak with your Paediatrician or GP. They will discuss your concerns and may consider a referral to local psychological support.

You can also find useful information under Emotional Health and Wellbeing section.

Need more information?

Here are some local and national organisations that support young people generally with emotional wellbeing. All of the strategies can be useful for children with or without a neurodevelopmental condition, however you may need to communicate these differently.

Keep Your Head website which offers information on local services for children and young people.
Chums are a local service that provide useful information and interventions for children and young people. You can self-refer via their website.
Young Minds - This is a children and young people's mental health charity who offer information and a parent helpline.
National Autistic Society
Anna Freud Centre National Centre for Children and Families has useful resources which can help parents and carers to manage their children’s mental health difficulties
Depression in Children and Young People - describes signs of depression in children as well as some helpful advice.
Looking after a child’s or young person’s mental health

Emotional Health

What you can do to help

How we can help

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